Stephen Colbert

Stephen Colbert just nailed the GOP’s Christian hypocrisy on Syrian refugees with one Bible verse

Stephen Colbert just nailed the GOP's Christian hypocrisy on Syrian refugees with one Bible verse

The Late Show | Screenshot


The object of terrorism is to provoke fear and that’s exactly what ISIS has successfully done to leaders across the United States who now are denying humanitarian assistance to Syrian refugees. On Thursday night’s “Late Show” Stephen Colbert noted that the crisis is all anyone is talking about.

“Whether or not to let Syrian refugees into this country has become the new political issue, completely overshadowing the old political issue, whether to let Mexicans into this country,” Colbert said, a little too on the nose.

But Donald Trump says that Syrians are not going to want to come here anyway. Right now the United States is entering winter while Syrian refugees are probably more accustomed to higher temperatures. Trump wants to know why the hell they’d come to Minnesota where it’s under 40 degrees.

“It’s a tough call for refugees,” Colbert said. “Do I want to stay in a war zone where my family faces almost certain death or do I want to go somewhere where I have to put on a jacket before I go to the mall? I mean you’re walkin’ around, you’re carrying your coat. You get all sweaty. You go outside and forget to put it on and then you get a cold. I’ll take my chances with ISIS.”

Colbert played the clip of President Obama mocking GOP candidates for president who he said was first afraid of debate moderators and now are afraid of women and orphans. He might make a good point, but “why shouldn’t we be scared of three-year-olds? You think you can’t negotiate with terrorists? Try negotiating with a three-year-old.”

But there are a few candidates (Ted Cruz and Jeb Bush) who think that allowing Christian refugees into the country is fine. Cruz went on to say “there is no meaningful risk of Christians committing acts of terror.”

“I’m sure these guys right here are just campers roasting marshmallows,” Colbert said with a photo of the KKK with flaming crosses. “You can tell because they’re each wearing one-man tents.”

After all, like the plaque on the Statue of Liberty says: “Give us your tired, your poor, mostly Christians, and maybe one more two Indian guys with engineering degrees.”

“If you want to know if somebody’s a Christian just ask them to complete this sentence,” Colbert said pulling out his Catechism card. “‘Jesus said I was hungry and you gave me something to eat. I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink. I was a stranger and you….’ And if they don’t say ‘welcomed me in’ then they are either a terrorist or they’re running for president.”

Watch Colbert drop the mic here:

Stephen Colbert’s Utter Destruction Of What Little Cred Ben Carson Had Left Is Magical (VIDEO)


Digging up dirt on Ben Carson proved to be a fairly easy endeavor. Carson isn’t running for president with a background in politics or even a strong public presence; he’s running on what he’s written about himself in autobiographies. His own narcissism is what convinced him to run in the first place, and now the grandiose stories of his troubled youth and violent past are coming back to haunt him.

That’s because none of it ever happened. Carson has tried to portray himself as some lost soul who found his way through prayer and hard work, theories which can’t be corroborated by…anyone. What it boils down to is that Ben Carson is a pathological liar. His entire life story is and should be called into question. This man isn’t qualified to accurately remember his childhood, never mind run a country.

Stephen Colbert takes all of that into consideration as he mauls what’s left of Carson’s credibility. From the reports of his quiet, introverted demeanor from people who knew him as an adolescent to the ridiculous theories of pyramids and grain storage, Colbert rips Carson to shreds.

Carson has become fairly vocal about the backlash he’s receiving over his lies lately. He’s actually shown some emotion, which doesn’t fit into his motif at all, calling into question the vetting process every candidate goes through. Poor Ben doesn’t think anyone has ever been treated so unfairly. He says he’s been scrutinized more than any candidate…ever.

That’s simply not true. It’s not the media’s fault that finding ridiculous things about Ben Carson is so easy. When almost everything that comes out of the man’s mouth is a fabrication or in the very least an incomplete version of the truth, journalists can’t help but point out reality.

Carson may not see it that way, but that’s irrelevant. If he didn’t want his lies exposed he should have stayed in his giant shrine to himself and minded his own business.

Watch Stephen Colbert make a fool of Ben Carson below:

Elizabeth Warren demolishes the myth of “trickle-down” economics: “That is going to destroy our country, unless we take our country back”

Elizabeth Warren demolishes the myth of "trickle-down" economics: "That is going to destroy our country, unless we take our country back"

CBS screenshot


In an interview on “The Late Show with Stephen Colbert,” Warren explaines why Republican economics don’t work

Stephen Colbert once described Elizabeth Warren as the “school librarian you had a crush on” but on last night’s Late Show, she was the Sheriff of Wall Street.

Like every interview with the senior senator of Massachusetts, there was a question about whether or not she’d be running for President in 2016. “You are a household name in American politics,” Colbert said. “And yet, you are one of the few household names that is not running for President of the United States. Are you sure you’re not running for President of the United States? Have you checked the newspapers lately, because a lot of people have jumped in, you might have done it in your sleep…. These days politicians have to check the ‘opt-out’ button. It’s like unsubscribing from an email.”

“I’m sure I’m not,” Warren said.

Warren may not be running for president, but she said, that doesn’t mean she’s not in a fight for the future of our country. “Here we are, the richest country on Earth,” she said. “We have so much going for us, and yet we have a federal government that works great for millionaires. It works great for billionaires. It works great for giant corporations, for anybody who can hire an army of lobbyists, an army of lawyers, give lots of campaign money… For the rest of America, it’s just not working and it’s time to take that government back and make it work for us.”

Warren went on to talk about inequalities caused by trickle-down economics which she says hasn’t trickled down to anyone. “What happened starting in 1980?” Warren asked. “Remember trickle-down economics?” she asked.

“I do remember trickle-down economics!” Colbert said. “Rich guys like me, you cut my taxes, and then I spend more and eventually it trickles down to the people who don’t make the kind of money I do.”

Then Warren burst Colbert’s bubble:

“Except the last part never worked. So, what trickle-down economics was all about was saying to the rich and powerful, the government will help you get richer and more powerful… So starting in 1980 when it was all about ‘fire the cops,’ it was called deregulation, cut taxes for those at the top, which means there was less to invest on education, on infrastructure, on basic research. So, what’s happened from 1980 to 2012 … the answer is the 90 percent, everybody not the top ten percent, how much of the growth did they get? That GDP kept going up. How much of the income growth did they get? And the answer is zero! None. Not a bit.”

At this point, the audience was dead silent. Warren continued:

“One hundred percent of income growth in this country since the 1980s has gone to the top ten percent and that’s not only wrong, that is going to destroy our country unless we take our country back!”

At this point, the audience went wild.

This is the same kind of populist rhetoric we’ve come to expect from Warren, but with Senator Bernie Sanders overfilling auditoriums on a message of income inequality, the fight for fairness increases in intensity. Some day, they could even ask a question about it at a republican presidential debate!

Watch Senator Warren below:

Stephen Colbert dismantles Ted Cruz’s anti-gay bigotry & tax cut fanaticism

Stephen Colbert dismantles Ted Cruz's anti-gay bigotry & tax cut fanaticism

Ted Cruz on “The Late Show with Stephen Colbert,” September 21, 2015. (Credit: NBC)


“The Late Show” host quizzed Cruz on the Constitution, while the audience booed the presidential hopeful

Republican presidential candidate Ted Cruz paid a visit to Stephen Colbert’s two-week-old “Late Show” set last night and sat for a grilling over the legacy of conservative icon Ronald Reagan tougher than any question the Texas senator fielded at last week’s debate at Reagan’s presidential library.

“Let me ask about Reagan for a second,” Colbert began before getting serious and noting the severe ideological divide between Ronald Reagan and today’s Republican Party. “Reagan raised taxes, OK. Reagan actually had an amnesty program for illegal immigrants. Neither of those things would allow Reagan to be nominated today. So to what level can you truly emulate Ronald Reagan?” Colbert asked Cruz, noting that Reagan worked with former Democratic Speaker of the House Tip O’Neill.

“Isn’t that what people want more than anything else,” Colbert questioned, “more than principles, is action?”

Cruz disagreed, claiming that he’s never heard from an American who has asked him to work more with President Obama, or “give in more to Barack Obama” as he put it.

“Could you agree with Reagan on those two things,” Colbert pressed as the crowd broke out in raucous applause, “raising taxes and amnesty for illegal immigrants?”

“No, of course not,” Cruz replied. “But Ronald Reagan also signed the largest tax cut in history,” Cruz pushed back defiantly. “He reduced government regulations from Washington and economic growth exploded.”

“He did,” Colbert conceded as Cruz continued. Noting that from 1978 to 1982, economic growth averaged less than 1 percent a year, Cruz argued that the true legacy of Reagan was limited government.

“But when conditions changed in the country, he reversed his world’s largest tax cut and raised taxes when revenues did not match the expectations, so it’s a matter of compromising,” Colbert recalled.

“It’s entirely possible that your plan might be the right one,” Colbert offered before asking Cruz if he’d be willing to compromise with his opponents if it turns out he doesn’t have the best solution “and not feel like you capitulated with the devil?”

Cruz joked to Colbert that there is “nothing diabolical about you” and insisted he doesn’t “respond in kind” when his opponents “throw rocks and insults.”

“When others attack me, I make of point of keeping it on substance,” Cruz argued. Cruz said he is merely fighting for the U.S. to “live within our means, stop bankrupting our kids and grandkids, and follow the Constitution.”

“And no gay marriage,” Colbert quickly added, opening the door for a debate on the Supreme Court decision with the former SCOTUS clerk.

“Well, actually, let’s be precise. Under the Constitution marriage is a question for the states,” Cruz retorted.

“It doesn’t mention marriage in the Constitution,” Colbert shot back to applause.

“The 10th Amendment states that if the Constitution doesn’t mention it, it’s a question for the states … I don’t think we should entrust governing our society to five unelected lawyers in Washington,” Cruz argued as Colbert’s audience began to boo the senator.

“Guys, however you feel, he’s my guest so please don’t boo him,” Colbert interjected.

“If you want to win an issue, go to the ballot box and win at the ballot box,” Cruz calmly concluded. “That’s the way the Constitution was designed.”

Republican front-runner Donald Trump will receive the Colbert treatment on Tuesday’s show.

Watch Cruz’s debate with Colbert below, via The Late Show:

‘I like this guy’: Stephen Colbert chooses Jon Batiste as ‘Late Show’ bandleader

TODAY SHOW – Pop Culture

New “Late Show” host Stephen Colbert may be missing his Colbeard, but it seems his new bandleader, New Orleans favorite Jon Batiste, is more than making up for that loss.

In a short-but-sweet video posted Thursday afternoon on Colbert’s “Late Show” YouTube page, the host digs into a plate stacked high with beignets while he introduces a new friend.

“People keep asking me who my new bandleader’s going to be. Well, I like this guy,” says Colbert, who throws it over to Batiste for a 17-second jam session. The camera cuts back to Colbert, who’s covered in what we hope is powdered sugar and a nearly empty plate. “So good,” Colbert says as he licks his fingers, right before Batiste hops into the frame and shouts, “Yeah!”

Batiste, a Juilliard-trained jazz musician and educator, is a celebrated New Orleans artist whose collaborators have included rocker Lenny Kravitz and jazz icon Wynton Marsalis.

The jazz great may have impressed CBS executives and gotten to know his new colleague a little better last year, when he and his band Stay Human performed on “The Colbert Report,” got the crowd — and Colbert — dancing, and literally took his music to the street for a rousing performance that thrilled audience members and pedestrians alike.

Batiste was “thrilled” to be a part of the show, according to the entertainment website The Wrap. “This is a match made in heaven,” he reportedly said. “Get ready for a love riot in late night.”

Colbert appeared to have only one concern about Batiste. “His music makes the audience feel so good, we may have to install a ‘Do Not Make Love’ sign,” he said, according to The Wrap.

The premiere of “Late Show with Stephen Colbert” is slated for Sept. 8.

Chris Serico

10 things you need to know today: May 8, 2015

AP Photo/Kirsty Wigglesworth


1.David Cameron’s Conservatives shock rivals in British elections
Britain’s Conservative party won an unexpectedly decisive victory in Thursday’sparliamentary elections, giving Prime Minister David Cameron another five years in office. The Conservatives on Friday were projected to win a majority in Parliament’s 650-member lower house and govern alone for the first time since 1992. The leader of the opposition Labour Party, Ed Miliband, resigned. Cameron’s win means the U.K. will face a vote on whether to stay in the European Union.

Source: Reuters

2.Justice Department says it will investigate Baltimore’s police
The Justice Department will investigate Baltimore police tactics, law enforcement sources said Thursday. A day earlier, Baltimore Mayor Stephanie Rawlings-Blake asked the Justice Department to launch a review of the city’s Police Department. Six officers are facing criminal charges over the arrest and death of Freddie Gray, a young black man who suffered a fatal spinal injury in police custody last month. Gray’s death sparked days of unrest. Police Commissioner Anthony Batts said he is “willing to do anything it takes” to regain the public’s trust.

Source: The New York Times

3.Court calls NSA collection of phone records illegal
A federal appeals court on Thursday ruled that the National Security Agency’s warrantless collection of millions of Americans’ phone records is not authorized under the Patriot Act and is therefore illegal. The program “exceeds the scope of what Congress has authorized,” the Second Circuit Court of Appeals wrote. The White House and defenders of the controversial program claimed Section 215 of the Patriot Act allowed for warrantless phone monitoring.

Source: CNN

4.Senate approves bill that would give Congress input on an Iran nuclear deal
The Senate on Thursday approved a bill that would give Congress the right to review any nuclear deal negotiated with Iran. The bipartisan compromise passed 98-to-1 after GOP leaders blocked efforts by some conservatives to amend it. The House is likely to approve its version next week. The deal would give Congress 30 days to review the final deal. The White House at first opposed the bill, but reversed course after Democrats secured changes making it more palatable to the Obama administration.

Source: The Washington Post

5.Ebola returns to doctor declared cured last year
A doctor declared cured of Ebola last year nearly lost his vision less than two months later when the virus was found to be lingering in his left eye, according to a study published Thursday in the New England Journal of Medicine. The patient, Dr. Ian Crozier, first fell sick when working as a World Health Organization volunteer in an Ebola treatment ward in Sierra Leone. He was released from Atlanta’s Emory University Hospital in October, but returned in December with fading eyesight and pain. His vision has improved with renewed treatment.

Source: The New York Times, The Washington Post

6.Stephen Colbert helps fund grants for South Carolina teachers
Comedian Stephen Colbert promised Thursday to fund all existing grant requests made by South Carolina public school teachers on the education crowdfunding site Colbert made the commitment in partnership with The Morgridge Family Foundation’s Share Fair Nation and ScanSource. Colbert and his allies will pay a total of $800,000 to fund nearly 1,000 projects proposed by more than 800 teachers at 375 schools. “Enjoy your learning, South Carolina,” Colbert said.

Source: The Greenville News

7.Senior leader of al Qaeda’s Yemen affiliate reportedly killed in drone strike
A senior commander of al Qaeda in the Arabian Peninsula, Nasr Ibn Ali al-Ansi, has been killed in a U.S. drone strike in Yemen, a spokesman for the terrorist organization said in a video posted online. Al-Ansi appeared in a video in January claiming that the group was responsible for the attack on the offices of the French satirical magazine Charlie Hebdo, in which 12 cartoonists and other magazine staffers were killed in revenge for the magazine’s caricatures of the Prophet Muhammad.

Source: CNN

8.Russian spacecraft crashes back to Earth
Russia’s Progress spacecraft reentered Earth’s atmosphere on Friday after going out of control while carrying supplies to the International Space Station. The unmanned cargo craft was believed to have been burned up nearly completely from the friction of reentry. The ship was launched on April 28, and returned to Earth over the Pacific Ocean. The space station is not in danger of running out of supplies. Another supply ship is scheduled to be launched — by the U.S. company SpaceX — in June.

Source: The Associated Press

9. Alex Rodriguez passes Willie Mays on the all-time home-run list
New York Yankees star Alex Rodriguez hit his 661st home run on Thursday to pass the legendary Willie Mays and take sole possession of fourth place on Major League Baseball’s all-time home-run list. Rodriguez was suspended for 2014 season over his use of performance-enhancing drugs. He said it was “a little awkward” to hear fans’ cheers. “I thought the reaction was incredible,” he said, “and it was very humbling.” The next slugger for Rodriguez to catch is Babe Ruth, who hit 714 career home runs.

Source: USA Today

10.Tom Brady says “deflategate” does not diminish Patriots’ accomplishments
New England Patriots quarterback Tom Brady said the so-called deflategate scandal had “absolutely not” taken anything away from his team’s victory in the Super Bowl. He said the Patriots “earned and achieved everything we got this year.” Brady said he needed more time before commenting directly on a damning report released a day earlier that said he probably had been aware that game balls were being under-inflated during the rainy AFC championship game in January. Under-inflated balls can be easier to throw and catch in bad weather.

Source: NBC News

Watch President Obama’s Full Interview With Stephen Colbert On ‘The Colbert Report’

The full interview on The Colbert


Shortly after crashing The Colbert Report to deliver his own version of “The Word,” President Barack Obama settled in with longtime faux-combatant Stephen Colbert for a lengthy chat.

The clip above covers the disappointing mid-terms (“the election didn’t go as I would have liked”), where he goes from here, the stunning recent jobs report and growing economy, and many of the factors revolving around the Keystone XL Pipeline.

Throughout the interview, Colbert’s trademark wit and humor were matched only by the President’s charisma — he snuck in a crowd-pleasing remark at nearly ever turn — and the screams of the young audience. After the break, the duo returned to continue their talk, this time discussing whether or not the POTUS still loves his job, his home life, the nuclear launch codes, and the temptation to push the limits of his office’s power.

7 worst right-wing moments of the week — Stephen Colbert is destroying America, apparently

7 worst right-wing moments of the week — Stephen Colbert is destroying America, apparently

Stephen Colbert, Bill O’Reilly (Credit: AP/Alex Brandon/Kathy Willens)


Conservatives lose their minds over last week’s late-night shakeup, while a GOP candidate talks incest

This article originally appeared on AlterNet.

1. Various conservative clowns: Stephen Colbert will single-handedly destroy America.

The hysteria on the right about Stephen Colbert’s elevation to CBS’s Late Night post has been nothing short of hilarious. Even before news hit that Colbert would replace David Letterman when he retires, Bill O’Reilly frantically declared that Colbert is responsible for the “destruction of America.” That’s quite a distinction, when there are so many other things vying for the title of “America’s Top Destroyer.” (Wait, reality contest show idea: “Who will be America’s Next Top Destroyer?”)

More than failing infrastructure, abject refusal to deal with the coming climate catastrophe, rampant, spiraling inequality to rival the Gilded Age, near daily mass shootings, the criminalization of poverty; or deportation of millions of legions of innocent undocumented immigrants [insert your favorite scourge here], it is Stephen Colbert who is ushering in the decline of this great nation. In addition, O’Reilly also said, Colbert is an “ideological fanatic,” a “deceiver” and responsible for the mayhem following UConn’s March Madness win.

No, we don’t really get that last one either.

Rush Limbaugh sputtered that Colbert’s promotion was “an assault on the heartland of America,” prompting millions of heartlanders to scurry to their bomb shelters with multiple firearms, canned goods and bottled water. He also said it represented a “redefinition of comedy,” a “redefinition of what’s funny.” This is true, Rush. Comedy has been redefined to mean something that makes actual people laugh.

And, after numerous attempts to identify the full extent of the outrage, Breitbart editor Ben Shapiro finally landed on this metaphor: In making a career out of pitch-perfect conservative pundit mockery, Stephen Colbert was guilty of no less than the moral equivalent of “vile political blackface.” Clever wordsmith Shapiro called this “Conservativeface,” a neologism that seems destined to catch on.

No word on whether Colbert is the Anti-Christ.Although a few years back a little outfit called Christfire implied as much, calling Colbert Stalinesque, Hitleresque and a bigger threat to America than Islamic terrorism.

All right ye liberals! You’ve been warned! Laugh your way straight into Satan’s clutches.

2. Advisor to Texas GOP gubernatorial hopeful: (OK, it’s Charles Murray): There’s no evidence women are significant thinkers.

It’s pretty well known that American Enterprise Institute “scholar” Charles Murray is a colossally dishonest thinker who shrouds claims of white intellectual superiority in pseudo-science. But he has proven himself offensive and wrongheaded on other topics as well. This week at a talk at University of Texas, he stood by his claim that women have not contributed much significant thought to the field of philosophy. But don’t feel too bad, gals, because Murray did allow that some of you are very good in literature.

Murray’s enlightened views on women naturally include his oppositions to equal pay laws. He argues that such laws would hurt women by discouraging companies from hiring them, and anyway he doesn’t even believe in pay discrimination—it’s a myth invented by liberals. “Women prefer to stay home with their children,” he says. And they also choose lower-paying jobs.

Who cares what Charles Murray says, you ask? Well, Texas GOP hopeful Gregg Abbott does. He takes some of his cues on education from Murray and specifically cited Murray’s work in his argument against universal pre-K. Of course, Abbott keeps some pretty questionable company in general. He’s also appeared with Ted Nugent, whose enlightened views on women and blacks are fairly well known.

h/t: RawStory

3. Virginia GOP candidate Bob Marshall: No incest exception for abortion because sometimes people want to have incest.

The good people of Virginia have themselves a real prize in Republican Bob Marshall, who is running to represent them in Congress. In fact, his views are so extreme on things like abortion and same-sex marriage that even his fellow Virginia Republicans can’t stand him. And that is saying something. He’s the one who introduced the bill requiring women who want abortions to have an ultrasound first, which helped make Virginia the butt of late-night jokes.

Still, he does have a following among other crazy social conservatives who could carry him to a congressional seat, where he could continue to embarrass his state. Marshall is anti-abortion, anti-same-sex marriage and anti-Planned Parenthood. He has some pretty bizarre religious ideas, too. Remarks of his that came to light this week include his opposition to abortions even in the case of incest, because, “How do you know it’s not voluntary? Sometimes it is.”

He has also said that disabled children are punishment for women having abortions. Here is his very science-based assertion: “The number of children who are born subsequent to a first abortion who have handicaps has increased dramatically. Why? Because when you abort the firstborn of any, nature takes its vengeance on the subsequent children,” he said.

No clue as to what his source for this bizarre claim is. Voices in his head, perhaps.

h/t: RawStory and: RightWingWatch

4. Reince Priebus: There should be no caps on campaign donations at all!

The chairman of the Republican National Party, Reince Priebus, echoed the words of his master Charles Koch this week when he came out for removing all caps on campaign donations. He also suggested that donors should not even have to be disclosed. Well, theoretically, he thinks disclosure might be okay, but….

“I mean, you want to be for disclosure,” Preibus said. “But when you start to see some of the cases out there where people are targeted, and businesses are targeted and picketed and threatened for political contributions, then now you’re suppressing free speech through disclosure. So I mean, even things that I want to agree with are getting to be very difficult.”

So to summarize, money is speech and should therefore not be limited in any way (particularly when it is flowing into Republican coffers). But unlike actual speech, money should be spoken in secret and not be open to scrutiny or criticism.

Because that hurts money’s feelings.

5. Detroit columnist Nolan Finley: Woman candidate is “milking the vagina business.”

Detroit News’ editorial page editor and columnist Nolan Finley displayed his ability to keep it real classy this week. Notoriously anti-Democratic and pro-corporate, he has long been using his perch to rabidly oppose the candidacy of Democrats, most recently Democratic gubernatorial candidate Mark Schauer and his running mate, Lisa Brown. This week Finley wrote:

[Brown’s] confrontational style will give the ticket the spunk the colorless Schauer lacks, but won’t broaden his appeal. Brown could help bring in campaign cash, however. She’s still milking the vagina business, and is a minor celebrity among feminists.

Wait, there’s a vagina business that can be milked? How come we did not know that?

What that curious term means to Finley is that Lisa Brown favors reproductive rights for women, which in his world (roughly the 1950s) makes her an extreme left-wing liberal.

Milking the vagina business.

What will the Republican woman haters club come up with next?

6. Minnesota GOPer: I’m running for Congress because no child should be exposed to science.

Aaron Miller loves to tell the story of how his daughter came home in tears from school on the day when she learned about evolution. That’s not what her daddy taught her. Determined that his daughter and other innocent children should never again be exposed to science that might be upsetting to them, Miller was galvanized to run for Congress. The government has obviously declared “war on our values,” he thought. Well, he was just going to declare war right back at them.

Miller has already gotten endorsements from other creationists in government, like Minnesota State Rep. Allen Quist, who has  argued that it is only reasonable people and dinosaurs coexisted and that the Book of Job offers science lessons.

He also joins a GOP field full of anti-science deep thinkers, like Paul Broun of Georgia who knows that  evolution is a lie “straight from the pit of hell.” In Texas, all four GOP candidates competing for the lieutenant governorship in Texas are  pushing to teach creationism in public schools. Even more plentiful are the climate science deniers. They even get to head up congressional science committees.

Because the GOP is determined that every child should grow up in blissful ignorance.

h/t: ThinkProgress

7. Florida Rep: Floridians can’t vote on solar ballot measure.  

Solar energy is increasingly popular among Floridians, which is why a Republican representative is hellbent on keeping the issue out of the polls. As we all learned in high school civics class, democracy means not letting people vote on things you don’t want them to vote on. A Senate committee in the Sunshine State approved an amendment for the November ballot that would give tax breaks to businesses that install solar panels. But Ritch Workman is using his power as the chairman of the House Finance and Tax Committee to prevent that from happening. His lame excuse?

“I just don’t see the need to continue to expand the incentives and underwriting of solar,’’ Workman said. “Solar is coming a long way and eventually it’s going to be able to stand on its own two feet. But right now it doesn’t.”

More likely, say proponents of the bill, Workman is under the sway of Florida’s electric utilities, which adamantly oppose rooftop solar energy because it will end their monopoly.

Ah well, it’s not as if there’s some big hurry to convert to clean energy or anything. It’s not as if climate change and global warming are some big urgent problem that the whole country needs to immediately address in no uncertain terms in order to avert what is certain to be catastrophic climate events, the likes of which we are only just beginning to see. No, no, no.

Anyway, we all know the sun is for frying your skin, not heating your home or running your appliances. Silly.

10 things you need to know today: April 11, 2014

A torch is passed. 

A torch is passed. (AP Photo/CBs, Worldwide Pants Inc.)

The Week

Kathleen Sebelius resigns as Obama’s health secretary, Stephen Colbert is tapped to replace Letterman, and more

1. Sebelius resigns as health secretary
Kathleen Sebelius is resigning as health secretary after taking heat for months over the troubled ObamaCare website rollout. Sebelius, a former Democratic governor of Kansas, touted the health law as a success after a surge of sign-ups before the open-enrollment period ended March 31. On Friday, President Obama is expected to announced that he is nominating Office of Management and Budget Director Sylvia Mathews Burwell to fill the job. [The Associated Press]


2. Stephen Colbert picked to succeed David Letterman
Comedy Central star Stephen Colbert will take over for David Letterman as the next host of The Late Show, CBS announced Thursday. The handover will take place in 2015, although Letterman has yet to decide the date of his last show. “Simply being a guest on David Letterman’s show has been a highlight of my career,” Colbert, the 49-year-old host of The Colbert Report, said. “I never dreamed that I would follow in his footsteps.” [CBS Los Angeles]


3. Scott Brown enters New Hampshire Senate race
Former Massachusetts Senator Scott Brown announced Thursday that he was making another run for the Senate — this time in New Hampshire. Brown, a Republican, pulled off an upset to win the late liberal standard-bearer Ted Kennedy’s seat in 2010, only to be defeated by Elizabeth Warren two years later. Now he is trying to unseat Sen. Jeanne Shaheen, calling her a “rubber stamp” for President Obama. [The Boston Globe]


4. U.N. approves peacekeepers for the Central African Republic
The United Nations Security Council on Thursday authorized sending nearly 12,000 peacekeepers to the Central African Republic. Christians and Muslims have been fighting there for months. The U.N. troops are scheduled to take over for about 6,000 African Union soldiers in September. They’ll be aided by a 2,000-member French force already there. U.N. Secretary-General Ban Ki Moon said the African Union force had become “overwhelmed.” [Los Angeles Times]


5. Man surrenders after fatal Florida day-care center crash
A Florida man with alleged gang ties, Robert Corchado, turned himself in at the Orange County, Fla., jail Thursday to face charges that he fled the scene of a fatal accident after hitting a car with his SUV, and sending the other vehicle crashing into a day-care center. A 4-year-old girl, Lily Quintus, was killed in the KinderCare center. “She was incredible and she deserved so much more,” her mother, Nicole Quintus, said. [CNN]


6. Ten die when a FedEx truck and a bus collide in California
Ten people were killed Thursday when a FedEx truck crossed a Northern California freeway andslammed into a charter bus, bursting into flames. The bus was carrying a group of high school seniors on their way to visit Humboldt State University. The drivers of the truck and bus reportedly were killed, as were five students and three chaperones. [USA Today]


7. Scientists implant lab-grown vaginas in four patients
Medical researchers have successfully implanted lab-grown vaginas in four teenage girls born with underdeveloped vaginas due to a rare condition called Mayer-Rokitansky-Küster-Hauser Syndrome. The process, described in an article published this week in The Lancet, involved taking a vaginal tissue sample from each patient, and using it to grow cells that were layered onto biodegradable scaffolding, then implanted. [The Washington PostThe Lancet]


8. Hillary Clinton dodges a shoe thrown during her speech
A woman was taken into custody Thursday after allegedly throwing a shoe at former Secretary of State Hillary Clinton, who was giving a speech to a metal-recycling conference at a Las Vegas hotel. Clinton crouched and dodged the projectile, then cracked a joke and continued her speech. “Is that somebody throwing something at me?” Clinton asked. “Is that part of Cirque du Soleil?” [Reuters]


9. California town declares Sriracha factory a public nuisance
The city council in Irwindale, Calif., has declared The Huy Fong Foods Sriracha factory, which pumps out 100 million pounds of the fiery sauce annually, to be a public nuisance because it emits noxious odors. The city had already won a lawsuit in November forcing the plant to partially shut down. Once the council gives final approval to the declaration at its next meeting, the company will have three months to figure out how to reduce the smell. [The Associated Press]


10. Nirvana and Kiss inducted into Rock and Roll Hall of Fame
Nirvana was inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame on Thursday in its first year of eligibility. Surviving Nirvana musicians Dave Grohl, Krist Novoselic, and Pat Smear performed some of the iconic grunge band’s hits, with singers such as Joan Jett, Lorde, and Sonic Youth’s Kim Gordon standing in for late frontman Kurt Cobain. Kiss, Yusuf Islam (formerly Cat Stevens), Linda Rondstadt, Peter Gabriel, and Hall and Oates were also inducted. [Rolling Stone]

Breaking: Stephen Colbert named next host of ‘Late Show’

Good news…

NBC News

CBS announced on Thursday that “Colbert Report” host Stephen Colbert will be the next to helm the “Late Show” desk. He’ll succeed David Letterman when Letterman retires next year after more than 20 years as the host.

The announcement raises several questions, chief among them whether the comedian will host the show in character, as he does on Comedy Central’s “Report.” Another question mark is where the show will be taped. “The Late Show” currently films at the Ed Sullivan Theater in New York, but CBS has not yet announced where the Colbert-helmed version will tape, or who the producers will be.

“Stephen Colbert is one of the most inventive and respected forces on television,” Leslie Moonves,  president and CEO of CBS, said in a statement. “David Letterman’s legacy and accomplishments are an incredible source of pride for all of us here, and today’s announcement speaks to our commitment of upholding what he established for CBS in late night.”

“Simply being a guest on David Letterman’s show has been a highlight of my career,” Colbert said in a statement. “I never dreamed that I would follow in his footsteps, though everyone in late night follows Dave’s lead.”

“I’m thrilled and grateful that CBS chose me. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to go grind a gap in my front teeth.”

This story will be updated.